Get Gears of War 3 now

Posted on October 5, 2011


Gears of War 3 review

Before the review commences, I present you a question: What is the only thing that can improve an automatic rifle?…

*tick tock, tick tock*

Time’s up.

Answer: A chainsaw. Gears of War 3 has gun-mounted chainsaws which you can “use” to exterminate hordes of enemies, what else does a guy need?

Under the very unlikely assumption that I haven’t yet won you over, I will just write the rest of the review, below.

Gears of War, the trilogy developed exclusively for Xbox 360 by Epic games (an aptly named studio) takes the tired first person shooter genre and violently bayonets it to a whole new level.

A whole new level!

Mind-boggling ingenuity and a small amount of  tweaks have in a word, made GoW 3 essential. Gameplay is tight, the controls are simple and at the end of the day with a simple button press, you can do extraordinary things. Isn’t that the whole point of gaming.

She's a beauty...

New weapons include a man-sized cleaver, the retro lancer, a laser-firing Vulcan cannon, and a mini-gun which requires two people to operate. Oh and a grenade launcher that submerges projectiles so they can traverse under cover. Now this is something you do have to see.

Gone are the frustrated driving sections and beserker-based whack a CoG boss-battle so to be frank, Epic games have listened to their fans and as a result, provided a golden experience which satisfies that primal desire for barbaric aggression, that so many people have.

The story isn’t going to win any Oscars anytime soon but all gamers need is a bad-ass enemy and a reason to shoot the aforementioned bad-ass. GoW 3 provides that, and more. For some reason zombies are introduced too, not because it is vital to the plot but because in today’s society there is high demand for undead mutilation. You only have to look at a popular titles such as Left 4 Dead, Dead Island, Resident Evil, Call of Duty, Dead Rising to see that.

The introduction of new characters I dubbed, “sexy blonde”, “Austrailian sexy” and “hip-hop guy” keeps things fresh although I must stress that they looked more like an urban dance crew than hardened soldiers or CoGs which can get distracting at times.

In co-op splitscreen, the story took a good six hours to complete but on the harder difficulty on a solo run it would probably take double that. Then there is the online multiplayer which was engaging, and solid and probably addictive, it will no doubt have a hard-core following as it is unlikely to steal the saddo award from Call of Duty.

Overall a fitting end to a fantastic trilogy which has made titles such as the PS3 exclusive Resistance look outdated and bland. Go, stop what you are doing, buy it now, if you haven’t already bought it, buy it again…